Songs About Jane and The New Romance are album titles that seem to promise collections of lovesick balladry. But the bands that made the albums, Maroon 5 and Pretty Girls Make Graves respectively, take vastly different approaches to music, lyricism and ambience. Maroon 5, who is coasting on the success of the single "This Love," mixes downtrodden romantic lyrics with jam band instrumentation for an album of soul-driven rock. Sample song names: "She Will Be Loved," "Through With You," "Sweetest Goodbye." Pretty Girls Make Graves doesn't focus much on love, preferring to write artsy songs backed by squalling guitars and manic but precise drumming. Sample song names: "All Medicated Geniuses," "The Teeth Collector," "A Certain Cemetery."
Dan: One of the clearest things I can say when comparing these two records is that one of these bands will get famous and one will not. And I don't think it takes a genius to figure out which one it will be. Pretty Girls Make Graves (a pretty horrible name for a band, I must say) is a group of shaggy, Pacific Northwest indie rockers who rock hard with jagged chords and aggressive melodies. Conversely, Maroon 5 was on MTV's "Room Raiders." They've also been on Saturday Night Live and the video for their single "This Love" is on heavy rotation on MTV. All of this is really a crying shame because, of the two, Pretty Girls have made the far superior record.
Rob: You'll get no argument from me on that point, and I'm not even that nuts about the Pretty Girls' The New Romance. But, if I have to pick the most mediocre albums of all-time, Maroon 5's Songs About Jane would be on my list. It's like Maroon 5 deliberately goes for the blandest lyrics, the blandest arrangements and the blandest instrumentation. None of their songs are offensively bad, mind you; they're just completely forgettable.
D: Wow, your scathing remarks leave me shocked. And strangely aroused. Regardless, I agree and disagree with you on the "offensive" nature of Songs About Jane. The music is indeed forgettable, but I really found singer Adam Levine's voice grating. Take a song like "Secret," which has such soft music that you're forced to concentrate solely on Levine's voice. He has this white boy soul croon that just seems artificial to me. It sounds like he grew up on Motown and is trying to ape their style, but his singing seems like a pale imitation of what soul singing should be.
R: Dan, you can't fall for every man who gets pissed off over a lousy CD. I'm glad you brought up the topic of Levine's voice, though, as Levine pretty nicely embodies my problem with Maroon 5. He has this nasal, dramatic delivery that's clearly meant to convey some sort of emotion, but his lyrics immediately undercut the vocals. He sings an entire album about nothing, fueled by wet-noodle simpering about relationships. Take Songs About Jane's first track, "Harder to Breathe" -- it opens with the line "How dare you say that my behavior's unacceptable?" I mean, whom is he telling off? His mom?
D: Well, for what it's worth, "Harder to Breathe" at least has some teeth on it. It's refreshingly aggressive and Levine doesn't appear to be trying too hard with the delivery. That song, "This Love" and, to an extent, "The Sun" are reasonably good tracks that minimize the flaws of Maroon 5's style. The band is at its worst, however, on songs like "She Will Be Loved." With its soft, shimmery guitars, over-emoting vocals and crashing cymbals, it seems like it should be the soundtrack to a teensploitation movie depicting a guilt-ridden Freddie Prinze Jr. as he paces the streets of New York trying to dig himself out of the mess he's made with his starlet du jour. Listen to it, you can totally picture the scene.
R: Yeah, I can picture a future of soundtrack b-sides and appearances on Carson Daly's late night show for Maroon 5 before they shuffle off to obscurity. Wow. We came down on them pretty hard, didn't we? Since I can't think of many nice things to say ("The Sun" is OK and I'll admit that "This Love" is sort of catchy), I'm going to shift topics over to the Pretty Girls. The New Romance didn't totally click with me, but I've got to say that I am impressed with their layers upon layers of rich drums and guitar chords.
D: I pretty much did a 180 on Pretty Girls. The New Romance is dark and noisy, but amazingly melodic and complicated. My favorite tracks are at the end, especially the title track and "This is Our Emergency." "Emergency" has this amazing energy to it, propelled by a throbbing bass drum and a snapping snare. Meanwhile, The New Romance's organ and drum intro is easily one of the catchiest and most original lead-ins I've heard in a long time.
R: My only hang-up with this album is that I occasionally get lost in the sonic morass. I think The New Romance is one of those CDs I'm going to go back and listen to track-by-track, over a long period of time, seeing as taking in everything during a few marathon sessions overwhelmed me. Nevertheless, I can say that "The Grandmother Wolf" is my pick for the album's top track. I like how it starts with thick guitars, which transition nicely to Andrea Zollo's vocals. Zollo definitely deserves praise for her performance throughout the album. For the most part, she's able to stand up to the strong instrumentation the rest of the Pretty Girls provide.
D: Zollo contributes some great vocals. Even though the guitars are loud and chaotic, she doesn't shout and always delivers a cool, crisp performance. I think she does her best job on "Holy Names," the quietest song on the album -- her voice sounds angelic among the squalling guitars. The New Romance rarely lets up, though. It's a loud record and full of energy. It's not something you'd want to listen to for every mood, but the musicianship and creativity is astounding.
R: That persistent energy is The New Romance's greatest strength and primary weakness. Songs like "Chemical Chemical" are loaded with delicious little guitar nuggets, but they're not necessarily tracks that I want to listen to in the traffic of my morning commute. Needless to say, though, between Maroon 5 and Pretty Girls Make Graves, I'll go with the Pretty Girls.
D: There really is no contest in this situation, as we've made pretty obvious. Maroon 5 is digestible, but dull (and sometimes shrill). Pretty Girls Make Graves is a band that is, frustratingly, never going to be an MTV staple because they are a challenging listen. This is a prime example of a band that won't cross over into the mainstream because people will be scared off by the band's name or the jarring guitars. However, for those who have the patience to give the whole album a listen, it's really effing rewarding. For those of you who wouldn't normally give The New Romance a try and end up not liking it, e-mail me and I'll buy you your very own "Maid in Manhattan" DVD. Promise.
